I'm sure that you want to have a happy marriage; ninety nine percent of people who get married do for love and happiness. The only problem is that you were never formally taught HOW to have a happy marriage. In this article I'm going to show 3 ways to improve your marriage if it isn't going the way you wanted and hoped that it would go.
1. Throw the word "if" out of your vocabulary. This type of thinking and speaking does not allow you to live in the real world with your real situations. It only causes anxiety and discouragement. This word causes you to live in fairy land and compared to fairy land NOTHING is good.
Statements such as "If I would have first gotten my degree, then I would be happy today" or "If I just would have..." just make you feel bad for yourself. You don't have a degree and you didn't do... so don't try to think how good it would have been if you did.
And the truth is that you do not necessarily know if that situation would have turned out any better than where you are today with the choices you made. Thinking this way is a waste of precious energy and allows for too much negativity.
2. Get into the "make lemonade out of a lemon" mode. I remember hearing this adage from my father so many times when I was young and it surely got on my nerves THEN. But now I see how right it is, (unfortunately I didn't take it to heart until many years after I heard it). Take whatever the situation is right now and make it the best you can. You will be AMAZED at how things will work out good. Always remember, more often than not, things could be worse. Be grateful for what you have and stop longing for what you don't have. Some of the best success stories for both life and business have come from these types of situations.
3. Stop just hoping. I met a friend of mine a few days ago. A very wealthy person (by inheritance) who just lost a lot of his money. I asked him what he was doing now and he said that he was trying to make his money back but he didn't want to work!
Did I give it to him!!!
Things don't work like that (except in Hollywood). If something is important to you and you want it then DO SOMETHING to get it. By just dreaming and hoping it will be, probably won't make it happen. Most solutions require work and effort to be put in to get the best results.
I'm sure that you got married in order to be happy; you just never learned how to have a happy marriage. Stop living in fairy land by dreaming "what would have been if" and dreaming and hoping about the future. Do the best you can to make your situation better now and you will be tremendously surprised at how much happier you will be.
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